RetroXotique

Excerpts from the Diary of Gabrielle Van Wettering (nee van Hessel)

by Mike

Chapter Two

December 12th 1834

Something has happened, I distantly heard my fiancée’s voice at the front door and raised voices. Some time later my uncle gives orders to Lissa , she then bathed me, and dressed me in what could be termed normal clothes, arms unbound, a shorter corset laced to on 38cm(16”), no brace, no collar and no ballet boots. My hair was combed and arranged in a delightful arrangement and I was taken to the sitting room. My Uncle was waiting with large box of fancies and a mug of sweet chocolate. He muttered something about rumours of starving me and stomped out. I got Lissa to bring me a book and spent a leisurely afternoon eating the sweets and drinking the sweet chocolate, which was refilled three times.

December 13th 1834

My Uncles punishment has wasted almost a week and only two to go before the wedding with so much to do, today I had to go for fittings at the dressmakers, stay makers and the boot makers, such a busy day. The sweets and the chocolates have kept coming and I keep eating them, as I am ravenous after my harsh diet. Mr Van Wettering does not seem welcome in the house any more and he met me at the door to escort me on my calls. 

The first call was to the stay makers and a pair of my new stays were fitted, they felt so tight, the new design is to give me a more oval shape and was so solid at the sides, that it could not be bent, and as I had a dress fitting later they tried to lace me down to 35cm (15”) with no time to ‘bed’ the corsets in. After fainting three times, they had to admit defeat at 39cm (16½”), I could not believe they felt so tight and even had the stay maker lay my old current corset over the new to show that they were the same waist size. I could only manage to leave the shop with the aid of smelling salts and the much needed support of Mr Van Wetterings arm, with the stay maker apologising and assuring me that I would be used the new shape in the shortest of time. 

At the boot makers, my foot was levered into the tight boots with extraordinary heels and platform toes that I was sure I would not be able to walk in them. I could not bear to remonstrate with Mr Van Wettering at their ludicrous height as I was so grateful to him for the harrying of my Uncle that had gained my release from my Uncles wrath. I could hardly stand on those incredible heels and my toes were mercilessly pinched. I exited the shop and was again glad of Mr Van Wetterings strong arm as I hobbled like an old woman from the door. I am afraid I fainted again as we reached the carriage from the discomfort of the shoes and the unrelenting pressure of the oval shaped corset which was forcibly rearranging my torso and my innards. 

The third visit was to Mrs Van Oustens and as we slowly crossed the salon to the fitting room I was gratified to see Marta the vendeuse, showing a costume in the style of my fashion plates, she looked so elegant, a very high collar emphasised her long neck and the beret sleeves were just enormous, making her tiny waist look even smaller above the huge skirts, and from her tiny steps I also judged she is wearing the highest of heels. I noticed the dress she wore had a deep décolleté, but still came up from her shoulders to a high collar with a stiff wide frill, Marta also wore atop her much curled head, one of the new enormous hats, that I had seen in the fashion plates, Mrs Van Ousten said that it was the style that they be as wide as the beret sleeves. Mr Van Wettering commented that it was a very comely oufit and that the collar was most tasteful.

Mrs Van Ousten had only managed to finish two of the morning outfits, and I was fitted for both of them, she tutted when she saw the new shape of my waist and the 1½” gap at the back, she immediately said that she would have to redo all the bodices and estimate the fit for a 15” waist. The morning dress was heavy, made as it was from a heavy sateen and many extra petticoats to fill out the massive skirts, I found the bodice, sleeves and collar very stiff, at which Mrs Van Ousten pointed out that I had ordered the strongest lining and double stitched seams. The enormous beret sleeves were even stiffer and had a rigid under structure, Mrs Van Ousten said this was the boning to support the large shape. I had tried to move my to reach upwards and found I had very little movement. I was going to say that they were totally unfeasible, when my fiancée said that I looked wonderful and would be the best dressed women in the Indies. Mrs Van Ousten also said that these sleeves caused problems, but a lady of fashion coped and that several she knew, had purchased knives and forks 1ft long so that they would be able to eat. My fiancée thought this a capital solution and said he would arrange such items. 

Seeing that I was in a fait accompli, I thought I would at least get my own way in one direction and noting my fiancée’s approval of Marta costume, instructed Mrs Van Ousten that all the evening dresses were to be provided with high collar and extreme decolette of Marta’s outfit. My fiancée commented that Marta’s collar was indeed very fetching, but Mrs Van Ousten put it that Marta had a long slim neck that suited that style and that I surely would not be able to manage it, My fiancée said that it did not matter if I could not accommodate the fashion, but it was such a pity. I dearly did not wish to let down my saviour and decided then and there that I would have the same collar on all my outfits, if my beloved found it so appealing. So brooking no arguments from Mrs Van Ousten I have ordered all my dresses with exactly the same collar. Now I must lie down as my new stays are gripping me so tight I feel my insides even at 16½”, must be crushed, but I fear I cannot loose them as I have to be laced to 15” in them when we board the ship for the Indies. I have had to ask Lissa to take my new boots off as my toes were on fire, I fear it will be many weeks before I am any where comfortable with them.

December 15th 1834

Horrors, although Mr Van Wettering has only been able to visit for a short time today, I fear he has angered my Uncle again in some way, as when he had left my ordered Lissa to dress put me in a full mask with the enormous black horsehair wig. And then on examining me he was not satisfied with the fit of the wig atop the mask as it also held my tightly bound hair underneath it. He then ordered Lissa to take of the mask and my beautiful hair was shorn completely off. He has left me bald. He was then angry again once he realised he would have to purchase some more wigs for the wedding and the trip.



December 16th 1834 

The wigmaker has visited today and my uncle has ordered several in a variety of violent colours in frivolous styles, there will be no way I will be able to conceal the fact that I am wearing a wig. Mrs Van Ousten called with an evening dress to try on, it was most becoming except for the new collar style, which I had specified, this was loose and very plain, not at all like the style that Marta had showed and my fiancée had so admired. I sent her away chastening her to get the collars as I had asked and to be quick about it as we leave next week. My Uncle seems a little guilty due to my shorn hair and has ordered that all my favourite foods and sweets be made available to me, I have eaten so much that I have had to ask Lissa to loosen my stays another inch. I also am slightly worried about the décolleté of the evening gown that I tried onto today, although bar the collar it was most fetching, it only just covered my breast buttons (nipples – Ed) and displayed a fair amount of bosom. I have been struggling with ballet boots and feel sure I will not be able to manage them. 

I have asked that Mr Van Wettering allow me to wear some lower heels, he said that there must be something wrong, as he was sure other ladies coped with ease. This afternoon we visited the boot makers and as we were waiting another customer was being fitted into some boots of the same design as mine, once they were fitted, she stood with ease and at first walked and then even waltzed around the shop on her vertiginous heels with out so much as stumble. I was going to say to the boot maker that they were impossible to wear but after that display could only ask for advice. He has suggested that I wear them much tighter laced so that the support comes from the whole boot and not just the toes and has also packed the toes with lambs wool. Following this advice I have found more comfortable but no easier to stand or walk in, at all times I feel I am about to fall and must constantly alter my stride to cope.


Editor : As said above, ballet heels were never a mainstream fashion. In Van Hessels effects was found a receipt for a payment to one A. Vanatola. The only reference found to that name was of Anatailia Vantaola who was a dancer in the Dutch Royal Ballet 

December 17th 1834 

Today my Aunt visited me and gave me advice about my forthcoming married life, she was very nervous and had to keep consulting her notes. She said that I must be subservient at all times to my new husbands wishes and make myself available to satisfy his manly urgings at all times. This she said is a women’s burden and I should at no time take enjoyment from the act and that it would be unladylike for me try and satisfy myself, my body was to become my husbands property and should be compliant to his will. It would seem that husband will expect to use both of my holes and my mouth to satisfy his cravings. 


December 18th 1834 

The wedding dress has been delivered and I am surprised that my Uncle has solicited no hidden surprises. My only trial will be the waist, he has set it to close at 14½”, I will be on the point of fainting for the whole ceremony. 


December 21st 1834 

We are now married and it is my first day aboard the good ship Maartel. The ceremony was a burden as my stays were so tight and I have put some weight back on in the past two weeks, I felt sick all day. The only thought that kept me going was the knowledge that after I was married I would be free of my Uncle’s control. He had one surprise left for me as when I retired to our bedroom, he had me bound in one of my sleeping sacks and trussed in red ribbon with a massive blond wig, set with ringlets stuck to my head. My new husband would not free me immediately, he was consumed with longing and I had to satisfy him 3 times with my mouth before he freed me. 

I fear he is not happy with me already, as I took so long to get dressed this morning. I had chosen one of the new day dresses and Lissa could not close the new stays even though they are only 15”, my waist does not want to take up the new narrowed shape. Also with the new collar design, Mrs Van Ousten has gone to far, they are now so high and tight that when it was first closed I felt as though I was being garrotted and Lissa had to release the fastening and leave a gap. To cover the gap at the waist and the neck I wore a shawl on the journey down to the dock. At the last moment we found that we had ordered no new gloves and so I had to make do with some provided with my Uncle, they were so tight that it took ten minutes to fit them and I could not move my fingers at all. All this took some time and we were half an hour late leaving for the ship. Our cabin is the largest on the vessel, but even so it is very tight due to my large skirts and beret sleeves and I can hardly turn round. The doors are tiny and Lissa has had to push me through, as I cannot get enough purchase with the tiny soles of my ballet boots. Waiting in the cabin was a delightful selection of sweets and chocolates and a large jug of warm sweet chocolate, my husband is worried that after my enforced diet that I should get my strength back. I was so worried that he would he would be shocked when he saw me without my wig and a shorn head, but he was not at all fazed. He said his dear mama always wore wigs or bonnets and could see no problem.